This is my favorite photo of me. A humble selfie. I’m not made-up or coiffed or Face-Tuned. It’s not a particularly well-composed shot by any stretch of the imagination. It’s not Instagram-ready. But in this photo is the woman I was born to be, and it took me 48 years to meet her.
See that river behind me? Up in the Himalayas, in the northern part of India, there are five rivers. Those rivers flow down and merge into two rivers. And then those rivers, one calm and one raging, flow down and merge at an ancient, remote, tiny town called Devprayag to become the River Ganges.
(I promise I’m going somewhere with this.)
The point at which the two rivers merge to become Mother Ganga is considered sacred. There, it is said that if you dip into the Ganges three times, you will clear your family’s karma through every generation.
The water was about 50 degrees. The rapids coming in meant that you had to hold onto a heavy chain in order to keep from being swept away. But I did it anyway. And when I came out, I felt a solidity, a stillness, a peace inside that I’d never known before.
I stood on the landing overlooking the river and thought about all that had come before, all I had known and all I had lost. And I knew what it had all been for.
What’s meant for you won’t miss you.
If you’ve been feeling stuck, if you feel like your own life is out of your control, if you’re grieving or lost or navigating a tough transition, maybe I can help.